Whenever possible, speak in common business language. Personal anecdotes could derail the meeting.

Metaphors bring comprehension to those lacking it; a literary tool that, when utilized correctly, helps explain abstract ideas.

However, metaphors are a slippery slope when used in the wrong context – like in a business meeting between two people who have little in common and, therefore, no real frame of reference to understand each others examples.

Take these excerpts from a meeting yesterday as a lesson in how not to relate to someone else. One participant was an African-American male in his ‘30s, “Tim,” the other a Caucasian male in his ‘40s, “Joshua.”

Joshua: Hi Tim, thanks for being on time. I am really excited about this meeting. It’s like when you’re a kid and you’re pulling up to your family’s cottage in Upstate Wisconsin.

Tim: Uh, yes, I can’t wait for this meeting either. We’ve been preparing on our end for weeks. You know, like when your entire extended family comes over for Christmas and you have to serve 100 people at once.

Joshua: Yeah, Tim, you know, I can’t say I know too much about that. I’m an only child….and Jewish.

As the meeting progressed, we got down to brass tacks.

Tim: I see where you’re going with this, but our company might not be ready for it. It’s like you want the drum line to be marching and we haven’t even learned the rhythm.

Joshua: Hmmm, not quite following you there, but I think I get the gist of what you’re saying. Maybe we can convince them to follow your lead. Like when I touted my New Balance shoes to the running club. Everyone questioned my motives at first, but then they learned what an outstanding shoe it is!

Tim: Right. Yeah. Well, I agree we need to lead by example, but some of these employees are just going to have to learn how to be disciplined and accountable. Like my grandmother always told me, “No one else is ever going to take responsibility for you.”

Joshua: Hmmm. Right. But we don’t want to micro-manage your employees. Like that episode of Friends where Rachael quits being a waitress because her boss is too nit-picky. We don’t want that to happen here. You know?

Tim: Uh, Sure.

Lunch was then served as the metaphor mix-up ended. But, the disjointed fun wasn’t over.

Tim: These are really good sandwiches. Where did they get these from?

Joshua: Whole Foods

Tim: What?

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